I was leaning on the sofa my head was placed on the pillow and was gazing constantly at the ceiling and observing the fan rotating. Lost in the thoughts, thoughts that hurt me every moment, the thoughts that refreshed the hurt corner of my heart, the thought that made my heart pound vigorously, and making my chest pain intensely. My eyes had become moist and the vision blurry. Without even blinking for a second I constantly gazed at the ceiling with my heart thumping vigorously. It was obvious for me to be like that.
This happens only in two of the cases when someone you love the most has hurt you or when you have been through constant phases of struggle and failure when success has betrayed you every time even if you have given your exact performance. In my case, it was both. I have tried harder every time but destiny has set no path for my success, neither in corporate life nor in love life.
“I have been a failure… I have been a failure…”
these words constantly howled in my mind. The people around me are laughing at my failure, they are enjoying the tough times in my life, and my failure has become a source of entertainment for society. Is failure that bad? Is it the rule that a person should always succeed even if he is unhappy with what society wants to make him? It feels like I have committed a crime and I have been sentenced to the life imprisonment. It feels like I have been trapped in the jail where I have to live by the rules of this cruel society.
This society has become the worst jail for me. This is what happens when you decide to do something against the will of the people in the society. You are not what you are, but you are what your society wants you to be. They want you to flow in the direction of the river, and if you decide to flow against the flow of the river, society will start criticizing you. They will laugh at you but they ignore a thing that, the more you stretch your muscle the more robust they become. I have been through the most difficult phase of my life, but this is the worst. The one who was there to support me is not present here.
I am alone in this quest,
in this quest to find my inner self, to explore my limits, and to be the one in a million. Will destiny help me make my way through? Would I be able to make trace my path towards success by crossing the hurdles? Would I earn someone’s support in my life? For every person, the God has created a person who will guide you towards your goal. Is there such a living angel in my life? If yes why is he not showing up? Where would my life lead me?
Let us have a look at my life. It begins three years before… But before this let me explain to you what happened yesterday? This is my story of struggle, hard work, failure, betrayal, and success.